POTWARTS
by DeathEater666
Summary: Well there is no magic in this story, but its hilarious. I suck at summaries, please read, its about Potwarts, a school that teaches you about pot, and other type of drugs, please just, read, if you dont like, than oh well..


In a train compartment sat three stoners on their way to Potwarts. One of the stoners, was famous because when he was just a baby, the almighty "Drug Lord" overdosed his parents, and attempted the same with Harry, but unfortuantely he lived. He grew up not even knowing his parents were the illest stoners, Potwarts has ever had. When Harry got his acceptance letter to Potwarts school of pot, and other drugs, he nearly passed out, HIS PARENTS WERE STONERS, was all he could think, he told his Aunt Petunia, and Uncle Vernon they finally said yes, even though they did not approve of such behavior, it was better that Harry was off their back.

The other two stoners, were Ronald Weedsley, and Hermione Mary Jane (yea i decide to change the last names so yea), they were close friends to the infamous Harry Pothead, and were also ill stoners just like him.

Harry Pothead also known as "The boy who lived from a severe drug overdose", finished his last blunt, and sighed. 

No more pot… Harry sighed, and began to talk to himself causing Hermione, and Ron to look at him like he was insane….

NO MORE POT?, HOW COULD THIS BE?, HOWW?? NOOOO I NEED WEEEED, OH GOD!!!!!!!, he screamed

Will u shut up mate!!, when we get to Potwarts there will be "a_ll_" the weed in the world, you can smoke one blunt after another. -Said a daydreaming Ron, thinking about the good old smoke up days back in Potwarts, sitting by the trees smoking ciggs, blunts, and there was the occasional sniffing of cocaine.

I think I'm going to ace my P.O.T exam this year, but I'm probably going to get a Outstanding on my Pot lessons class….- a know is all Hermione said making Harry choke on his cigarette smoke…

OH WELL _cough cough_ I _cough_ am going to ace my Potology exam _cough cough_- rolling on the floor Harry tried standing up but he was having another asthma attack, Hermione soon realized this and looked through his girlish purse and pulled out a crack pipe, not realizing it was Hermione tried handing it to Harry, he didn't accept, he just sat there coughing to the point where he was purple in the face, finally he managed to cough out a few words "THAATS cough my crack pipe… my asthma _cackle cough _innn---hhh—aaalllleeeer _cough_. Hermione looked down and suddenly felt stupid, for not knowing this and rummaged through his purse (yes purse) and finally found it, she handed it to Harry and he put his mouth to the mouth piece and slowly inhaled, finally after a few more coughs he pulled through, and cleared his throat and began to speak again..

Oh god Hermione how can u not know the difference between an i_nhaler_ and a _crack pipe_.. after Harry made this statement Hermione stood up and got so close to Harry he screamed like a girl…

Look here if you stopped smoking 5 packs of cigarettes a day you wouldn't be coughing like a bitch.. Hermione said waving her index finger in his face like a idiot.

Well you should still know the difference between a crack pipe and inhaler, I mean "HELLO" u go to Potwarts, the best "drug school" in England, and u still don't know the difference, god Hermione you really aren't the smartest stoner potwarts has ever seen since "Rowena Greengrass(_** A/N the founder of Ravenclaw**_), god. _Pssh_- waving his finger back like a complete faggot Hermione finally backed down and sat her ass back in her seat.

The three jumped when their compartment door was slowly opened, Harry screamed and jumped into Ron's arms like a well faggot, and Hermione hid under her seat. Finally when they realized who it was they just put on _their constipated faces_, and stared at the blonde boy standing in the door way. Malfoy entered the compartment, and was now examining them.

_PSSH _what are u like doing here Malfoy-- said Harry sounding like a valley girl, still in the arms of Ron..

Oh my god I shouldn't have disturbed you I'm really sorry- said a sarcastic Malfoy, pulling a joint out of his pocket, and held the lighter to it, he began to inhale, and realized Harry jumped out of Ron's arms and was now giving him the evil eye.

What Pothead your acting like you never seen a joint before.. –trying not to get tackled by Harry, Draco took three steps back and he was now standing in the doorway again taking large pulls.

POT where did u get POT from pot pot pot pot pot, screamed an insane Harry now lunging for Malfoy, the joint dropped to the floor, and Malfoy was cracking up as Harry began to tickle him..

H HHAA Pothead that tickles, ooooh ha ha ha ha ha – Malfoy suddenly paused when he realized Harry's hand when down to his crotch area.., causing Malfoy's noise to scrunch up in disgust.

So hows Malfoy junior doing, from what I've heard you've been very very naughty -Harry said now pointing his finger at Draco's crotch area ,and waving it back in forth, like a parent does to a child when he/she has misbehaved.

Pothead how dare u wave you finger at my family jewels you you, monster - sounding like he just got raped Draco screamed and ran out of the compartment crying hysterically…

Ron, and Hermione looked at Harry, and Harry looked back at them, finally after minutes of awkward silence Ron finally said something..

Harry I didn't know youu were well - Ron went up to Harry, and whispered "_gay" _in his ear.

Harry picked up the joint, that Malfoy had dropped, and continued to take pulls.

Well Ron wasn't it obvious, I mean come on the purse, the walk, the talk, his girly screams, wasn't it was obvious,- Hermione said looking at Ron like he was a complete idiot.

**Okay i didn't mean to make fun of anyone with asthma so noone take it offensive, please my brother , and mom have asthma and i know its nothing to joke about, but Harry is a o.d smoker, so yeah u get the point... Okay... well i hope you guys really enjoyed this chappy, next one will be even more hilarious... **


End file.
